Thursday, June 09, 2005

Going All-In on the Poker Game of Life

The title of today's blog sums up the metaphorical and literal happenings of my life in recent days. It is also sponsored by the letter R, the number 3, and by viewers like you...

My Biggest Accomplishment Since I Won Back-to-Back Participation Trophies in Little League


As I've talked about several times lately, I've been playing online poker. A lot. I play in tournaments on PartyPoker.com, usually only with a dollar or two buy-in. These tournaments generally cap out at 2000 people, most of whom love hurling the "stupid noob" insults around.

As a side note, to anyone who has ever used the word "newb", "noob", or "newbie," just remember...you once fell under that category as well. So for the love of God, get out of your mother's basement, earn a decent living, and stop justifying your inferiority complex in an online poker game.

Wow, I feel a lot better.

So anyway, I played in one of those tournaments last night and actually managed to place 45th out of 2000. I'm a happy addic...uh...gambling afficionado, as the higher ranking pocketed me $7.fitty (the word "fifty" has forever been eradicated from my vocabulary).

I can't think of a witty transition, so let's just go to the next topic, shall we?

Decisions, Decisions

I have been in a very introspective state lately. Simply put, I've had no idea what the hell I want to do with my life. Well, in a very sudden and strange string of epiphanies, I came to two conclusions last night:

1.) Outside of wrestling and improv, I'm putting acting on-hold right now.
and
2.) I'm definitely going for my Masters, hopefully in the Fall.

I really can't pinpoint one specific event yesterday that drove me to these conclusions. Within a two-hour span, everything just became very clear in my head, for the first time in awhile.

The acting epiphany was very strange. I was going to audition for a play in Wilmington this Friday, only to find out yesterday afternoon that the audition was actually last night. All of the sudden, my mind started going 733.78 miles per minutes (yup, I counted). It hit me that the greatest personal satisfaction as a performer has stemmed from wrestling and improv; in both of those worlds, I essentially have the control over my character(s). With the number of auditions I've been to in the past few years for films and what not, I'm just not hitting as strong a chord with other people's visions as I would like. Being someone who values personal creativity and who totally respects the creativity of others, I feel that right now, my direction in performing is better suited for avenues in which I have more creative freedom for myself.

I am not all saying I am quitting pursuing film or stage acting. I just feel that I'm going to gain the most growth as a performer by going down the path that has garnered the most personal satisfaction for me.

Oh, and I decided to can the play audition. So there's Epiphany #1.

In terms of the Masters, I know I've been saying for a while that I want to do it, but I just never fully committed myself to going for it. Now, I really have no doubt in mind that this is the direction where I need to head. My top choice is to pursue a Master in Liberal Studies. I love the course selection and I'm a liberal...a perfect match. I emailed the Dean yesterday to see if it is too late to apply for the Fall. If it is, I'm going to go full-speed ahead with it in the Spring.

So we'll see how it all goes. I definitely have a renewed excitement for what lies ahead...probably because I'm no longer so freaking confused about the direction of my life. ;)

Until next time...
Dan

2 Comments:

At Friday, June 10, 2005 6:07:00 PM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Hmm, is that a quarter-life crisis I smell? Yay for staying in school during times when you don't absolutely have to!
P.S. I would NOT recommend taking summer courses like some Cuz(tm) decided to do

 
At Friday, June 10, 2005 7:51:00 PM, Blogger Dan said...

Nope, it's an 1/8-life crisis. Screw the skeptics...I'm making it to 200.

In terms of going back for a degree, a wiseman once said, "I pity da fool who don't stay in school." Those nuggets of wisdom from Mr. T's cartoon never failed to keep me both informed and entertained.

 

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